On Acquiring Norton

A pretentious poem by a pretentious first year

Oh Norton! I shall grow to worship you
Oh Norton!
As you lie abed with me,
Your preface full of promise,
You tease and tempt me with your curling covers.
Now I own you, Norton,
Now your weighty testament is mine,
Or will be mine,
When courage and love combine
In me to possess what you bear extravagantly
In your fine-plumed pages.

anon

Boy and Girl